{"id":13773,"date":"2012-05-07T06:20:21","date_gmt":"2012-05-07T11:20:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/?p=13773"},"modified":"2012-04-25T09:38:52","modified_gmt":"2012-04-25T14:38:52","slug":"book-a-minute","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/?p=13773","title":{"rendered":"Book-a-Minute"},"content":{"rendered":"

The fine folks over at RinkWorks know that our time is valuable. They’ve saved us loads of it by taking out all of the filler–there’s a startling amount of it–from works of fiction, allowing each book to be read in a minute or less<\/a>. It’s surprising how much of the actual flavor of the work they manage to maintain.<\/p>\n

The Collected Work of H. P. Lovecraft<\/b>
\nUltra-Condensed by Thomas Deeny<\/p>\n

Narrator<\/b>
\nI will tell you about something horrific I witnessed.<\/p>\n

(Narrator discusses MUNDANE experiences which supposedly lead up to something HORRIFIC.)<\/i><\/p>\n

Narrator<\/b>
\nWe’re almost at the horrific bit.<\/p>\n

(Narrator talks about more stuff that might be SPOOKY if he’d only GET ON WITH IT.)<\/i><\/p>\n

Narrator<\/b>
\nWe’re very close now.<\/p>\n

(Narrator draws it out MORE.)<\/i><\/p>\n

Narrator<\/b>
\nThis time I swear we’re just about at the horrific thing almost.<\/p>\n

(Narrator FINALLY gets to the HORRIFIC thing which is HUGE and POWERFUL and EVIL and LAME.)<\/i><\/p>\n

THE END<\/b><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

(I think my favorite is still Interview with the Vampire<\/a>. Now that’s<\/em> accurate.)<\/p>\n

Also check out their Movie-a-Minute<\/a> section.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The fine folks over at RinkWorks know that our time is valuable. They’ve saved us loads of it by taking out all of the filler–there’s a startling amount of it–from works of fiction, allowing each book to be read in a minute or less. It’s surprising how much of the actual flavor of the work […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13773","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funny-peculiar"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13773","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=13773"}],"version-history":[{"count":27,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13773\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14637,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13773\/revisions\/14637"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=13773"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=13773"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=13773"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}