{"id":14162,"date":"2012-03-28T07:40:27","date_gmt":"2012-03-28T12:40:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/?p=14162"},"modified":"2012-03-28T07:39:12","modified_gmt":"2012-03-28T12:39:12","slug":"cryptocurium","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/?p=14162","title":{"rendered":"Cryptocurium"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/03\/lollipops-108x150.jpg\" alt=\"Absinthe Skull Pop\" title=\"Absinthe Skull Pop\" width=\"108\" height=\"150\" class=\"contentimg\" \/>If Willy Wonka ever decided to set up shop in Hell, I&#8217;m fairly sure the result would be something like <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cryptocurium.com\/\">Cryptocurium<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>They&#8217;re custom candymakers based in New Jersey, and their &#8220;handmade edible art&#8221; takes its themes from strange legends and macabre fiction.  They&#8217;ve gotcher <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cryptocurium.com\/?page_id=270\">Chocolate Aztec Sacrificial Hearts<\/a>, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cryptocurium.com\/?page_id=141\">Absinthe-Flavored Lollipops<\/a>, and <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cryptocurium.com\/?page_id=368\">Gummy Cthulhus<\/a> right here, pal.<\/p>\n<p>They have a whole range of <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cryptocurium.com\/?page_id=30\">Lovecraft-themed lollipops<\/a>, in shapes ranging from the Necronomicon to Nyarlathotep (he&#8217;s raspberry-flavored, in case anyone was wondering).  Their <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cryptocurium.com\/?page_id=64\">Chocolate Skulls<\/a> come in four varieties, including &#8220;Spicy Xocolatl,&#8221; and although they aren&#8217;t quite life-size they&#8217;re about the size of a baseball and surprisingly inexpensive.<\/p>\n<p>The one that really blows my mind, though, is their <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cryptocurium.com\/?page_id=322\">Edible Vampire Hunter Kit<\/a>, which includes hard-candy bottles of holy water and holy oil, a fabulously-detailed miniature chocolate bible, a dark chocolate crucifix, white chocolate garlic, and three milk chocolate wooden stakes.  Yowza.<\/p>\n<p>I can&#8217;t find anything on their site about whether they ship internationally or not, but for folks in the U.S. there&#8217;s still time to order before Easter.  (If you don&#8217;t think an Easter basket filled with candy Shoggoths wouldn&#8217;t be hilarious, you may be on the wrong blog.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>If Willy Wonka ever decided to set up shop in Hell, I&#8217;m fairly sure the result would be something like Cryptocurium. They&#8217;re custom candymakers based in New Jersey, and their &#8220;handmade edible art&#8221; takes its themes from strange legends and macabre fiction. They&#8217;ve gotcher Chocolate Aztec Sacrificial Hearts, Absinthe-Flavored Lollipops, and Gummy Cthulhus right here, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-14162","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-needful-things"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14162","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=14162"}],"version-history":[{"count":14,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14162\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14307,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14162\/revisions\/14307"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=14162"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=14162"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=14162"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}