![\"Moose\"](\"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/moose.jpg\")
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A while back I mentioned<\/a> a BoingBoing post wherein one of the comments was a splendid bit of microfiction. This appears to be an ongoing thing over there; they recently posted a video<\/a> of a guy in a quadcopter encountering a rather puzzled moose. Commenter allium<\/a> responded with this bit of brilliance:<\/p>\n “Rocky…is that you? My God, what did those Pottsylvanian bastards do to you?”<\/p>\n It was my own government that did this<\/i>, I think in jagged letters ten feet tall. Of course after the cyborging I can only talk in Bluetooth, 802.11, and half a dozen classified military frequencies, and I left my loudspeaker module back at the base during my escape, so all Agent B hears are the chainsaw buzz of my rotors. He only knows it’s me because the boys under Groom Lake painted a cartoon of…what I was…on my fuselage. As a joke<\/i>. They thought it was hilarious<\/i>.<\/p>\n So I yaw back and forth, hoping he’ll interpret that as a “no”.<\/p>\n Steam rises from B’s nostrils as he tosses his massive, antlered head back. “When I see Fearless Leader again. I’m gonna pull a can of whoop-ass out of my hat!”<\/p>\n By the Great Acorn Above, he’s dense<\/i>. I dispense some eka-meth from my internal drug reservoirs to focus; two point eight seconds later I come to a decision and warm up the excimer.<\/p>\n “But wait a second…the Admiral told me you were dead! He spoke at your funeral! He…” B trails off as he sees words of fire appear vertically in the bark of the trees in front of him, one word per trunk. My targeting system is very precise – assassination tools generally are.<\/p>\n “PEACHFUZZ BURNED ME. CALL CLOYD AND GIDNEY.”<\/p>\n Two hours later and thirty miles to the west, B paws at a nondescript hillock of frozen earth to uncover the squirt transmitter we buried there after the Upsidasium Affair. As dirt flies into the air, I idly wonder whether there’s room for a squirrel brain in a Metal-Munching Mouse chassis, and how long it would take to get through a certain flag officer’s sternum with its gleaming titanium teeth.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n I love the idea of a cyberpunk spy thriller starring Rocky and Bullwinkle. (The references to Cloyd and Gidney and their metal-munching mice make it particularly wonderful.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" A while back I mentioned a BoingBoing post wherein one of the comments was a splendid bit of microfiction. This appears to be an ongoing thing over there; they recently posted a video of a guy in a quadcopter encountering a rather puzzled moose. Commenter allium responded with this bit of brilliance: “Rocky…is that you? […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-17277","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funny-peculiar"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17277","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=17277"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17277\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":17296,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17277\/revisions\/17296"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=17277"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=17277"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=17277"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}\n