{"id":24274,"date":"2015-03-17T05:13:05","date_gmt":"2015-03-17T10:13:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/?p=24274"},"modified":"2015-03-11T13:01:21","modified_gmt":"2015-03-11T18:01:21","slug":"seen-online-73","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/?p=24274","title":{"rendered":"Seen Online"},"content":{"rendered":"

GHOST SCHEDULE:
\nWind noises
\nMess with cat
\nGet Scrooge to check his shit
\nMove knick knacks
\nGaze at cheeseburger, unable to weep
\n— josswhedon<\/a><\/p>\n

I just went to Jane Austen third base: making unpleasant eye contact with a handsome man on subway.
\n— erinhollyfenton<\/a><\/p>\n

My new hobby is sitting outside on campus at night in my 1940s clothes and when people say things to me, I say “You can see me?”
\n— ShadyLadyHH<\/a><\/p>\n

parenting tip
\nif you want to avoid the world’s aggressive gendering of your infant, consider skipping the pink dresses or blue coveralls in favor of dressing your baby solely in tiny halloween costumes<\/p>\n

strangers on the sidewalk: aww, is it a boy or a girl?<\/p>\n

you: uh…it’s pretty clearly a DINOSAUR
\n— idiopathicsmile<\/a><\/p>\n

My spellchecker just softly and silently corrected “tumblr” to “tumor”. And I thought, WHAT DOES IT KNOW THAT I DO NOT?
\n— neilhimself<\/a><\/p>\n

“You have my sword.”
\n“And you have my bow.”
\n“And my axe!”
\n“And my humidifier!”
\n“That’s nice, Murray.”
\n– The Fellowship of the Ring & Murray
\n— sween<\/a><\/p>\n

before blaming others, think: whats the 1 constant in all your failed relationships? its that cursed egyptian amulet why do u even have that
\n— drarna<\/a><\/p>\n

Gets tattoo in Sanskrit meaning: “It doesn’t say anything.”
\n*waits
\n— clindsaysway<\/a><\/p>\n

Kids having the best time ever sound exactly the same as kids being axe-murdered.
\n— myles_morrison<\/a><\/p>\n

I just described Purim to someone as “Jewish Halloween.” Or, Challahween.
\n— Alex_Edelman<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

GHOST SCHEDULE: Wind noises Mess with cat Get Scrooge to check his shit Move knick knacks Gaze at cheeseburger, unable to weep — josswhedon I just went to Jane Austen third base: making unpleasant eye contact with a handsome man on subway. — erinhollyfenton My new hobby is sitting outside on campus at night in […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-24274","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funny-peculiar"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24274","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=24274"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24274\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":24426,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24274\/revisions\/24426"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=24274"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=24274"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=24274"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}