{"id":30135,"date":"2019-03-12T05:55:01","date_gmt":"2019-03-12T10:55:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/?p=30135"},"modified":"2019-03-06T07:36:46","modified_gmt":"2019-03-06T12:36:46","slug":"seen-online-125","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/?p=30135","title":{"rendered":"Seen Online"},"content":{"rendered":"

mother: *holding newborn for first time* awww look at you, you have my eyes.
\nFather: and my smile
\nAragorn: you have my sword
\nLegolas: and you have my bow
\nGimli: and my axe
\nNurse: Can we get Security in here please, theyre back again.
\n— eddytheaxe<\/a><\/p>\n

While Anubis is weighing your heart, you give a quick squeeze to the squeaky toy you had buried with your body. His expression remains static, but you think you saw his tail wag, just a little bit.
\n— TheDoorTHEDOOR<\/a><\/p>\n

HOW CAN ONE BELIEVE IN ROMANTIC LOVE WHEN YOUR PARTNER NEVER ONCE GETS TO SEE YOUR WHOLE SKELETON
\n— SICKOFWOLVES<\/a><\/p>\n

Obi-Wan: If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine*
\nObi-Wan: *turns into semi-helpful ghost*
\n— ObsKenobs<\/a><\/p>\n

NO MORE BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD UNTIL HE FINISHES HIS VEGETABLES
\n— SissyNat<\/a><\/p>\n

Every time I put my son down for a nap he wakes up evil and I’m starting to regret building his crib over this ancient burial ground.
\n— daddydoubts<\/a><\/p>\n

The hardest part about painting is getting the eyes right…the way they move, the WAY THEY GROW AND SPIRAL, THE THING THAT HUNGERS RISING WITHIN THEM, TWO DARK WELLS WITHIN WHICH A VOICE SINGS TO YOU A VOICE THAT IS HORRIFYINGLY FAMILIAR…
\n— hottestsingles<\/a><\/p>\n

so I says to Ernest Hemingway “funny thing; you mention the missus really likes one kind of baby shoes, and what happens? the whole damn family give you them for Christmas. Six pairs, what’s the use in that? You’re a writer, help us out with this eBay listing”
\n— dsquareddigest<\/a><\/p>\n

life hack: u dont have to be a wolf to yell sad noises at the moon
\n— reallyreallyreallytrying<\/a><\/p>\n

unpopular fantasy opinion: dragons shit gold. that’s why the lairs are filled with it etc, they don’t collect it they create it. Think about it – do you ever see dragons bringing sacks of gold home?<\/p>\n

No, it’s whole cows. Then time passes, then there’s gold.<\/p>\n

Not rocket science.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

— mykola<\/a>
\n(Note: The ensuing comment thread<\/a> is worth a read.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

mother: *holding newborn for first time* awww look at you, you have my eyes. Father: and my smile Aragorn: you have my sword Legolas: and you have my bow Gimli: and my axe Nurse: Can we get Security in here please, theyre back again. — eddytheaxe While Anubis is weighing your heart, you give a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-30135","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funny-peculiar"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30135","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=30135"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30135\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":30174,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30135\/revisions\/30174"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=30135"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=30135"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=30135"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}