{"id":9425,"date":"2011-02-02T07:11:03","date_gmt":"2011-02-02T11:11:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/?p=9425"},"modified":"2011-11-22T08:50:26","modified_gmt":"2011-11-22T12:50:26","slug":"seen-online-25","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/?p=9425","title":{"rendered":"Seen Online"},"content":{"rendered":"

I wish in Harry Potter, instead of saying “he who must not be named” they just called him Shmoldashmort.
\n— erockappel<\/a><\/p>\n

I was escorted out of the funeral before I was done high fiving everyone.
\n— Zaius13<\/a><\/p>\n

“Fire!” isn’t the worst thing you can yell in a crowded theater. It’s “Bruce Willis is dead”.
\n— King of the Hill<\/p>\n

For young people wondering what the Dave Matthews Band is, imagine Jack Johnson having sex with all of the instruments in Whoville.
\n— sethmad<\/a><\/p>\n

People are like snowflakes. I hate shoveling them off my driveway.
\n— badbanana<\/a><\/p>\n

It must suck being a female necrophiliac.
\n— YUCKYBOT<\/a><\/p>\n

Vegetarians maliciously starve animals by competing with them for the same food.
\n— TheBosha<\/a><\/p>\n

Worried you don’t get enough calcium? Kill people and eat their bones!
\n— donni<\/a><\/p>\n

It’s amazing what you can accomplish when you do things out of spite.
\n— sween<\/a><\/p>\n

My bologna does not have a first name. I fear giving it one will make it self-aware.
\n— sucittaM<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I wish in Harry Potter, instead of saying “he who must not be named” they just called him Shmoldashmort. — erockappel I was escorted out of the funeral before I was done high fiving everyone. — Zaius13 “Fire!” isn’t the worst thing you can yell in a crowded theater. It’s “Bruce Willis is dead”. — […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9425","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funny-peculiar"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9425","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=9425"}],"version-history":[{"count":14,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9425\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12943,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9425\/revisions\/12943"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=9425"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=9425"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.shadowmanor.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=9425"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}