The Art of Darkness


December 6th, 2012 by Cobwebs

PornamentsThis site is ridiculously NSFW and is likely to permanently scar small children and housepets. Proceed with appropriate caution.

Pornaments is pretty much exactly what the name would lead you to expect: A whole collection of whimsically-pornographic Christmas ornaments, just in case you feel like your tree isn’t complete without a teddy bear in assless chaps or some elves doing it doggie-style. They’re weirdly cute.

The ornaments are all the “Old World”-style silvered-glass-and-glitter that are often found in kitschy shapes,* which somehow makes them rather charming. Although some are blatantly non-family-safe, there are a number of them that are more stylized and won’t automatically give your in-laws apoplexy. (I do, however, think that the best use of these would be to quietly sneak one on to said in-laws’ tree and see how long it takes someone to notice.)

Anyway, if you’re looking for something really unique to add to the tree or use as a particularly-arresting gift topper, this is the place to look.

*Speaking of that, Merck does a whole line of Halloween-themed ornaments in that style.

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