Dionysus is a fertility god most associated with wine and its cultivation, but really he is a manifestation of the untamed urge inside all living things to grow and reproduce. He is the god of mistakes you made in college.
— Burgeoning Lads of Science

I put suicide notes next to roadkill so their animal families have some closure
— ilovepie84

My famous last words will be words no one ever heard before, like “clarf” or “putesnix.”
— donni

My bet is that every painting has a metaphysical twin, a combination of Dorian Gray and Pickman’s Model, moldering in another place. With the artist gone, the linked pairs will start to turn… here people will slowly start to notice new tentacled figures emerge from odd shadows in their favorite works… and elsewhere ancient old ones will curse light stains seeping across their own loved paintings, as hip young sarcastic shoggoths smirk and roll their thousand eyes.
— Jim Saul, commenting on Thomas Kinkade’s death

Stupid people aren’t flammable enough.
— Schmoodles

apparently “finders keepers” doesn’t apply to corpses
— IamEnidColeslaw

Some times I eat stale bread just to prove to the rest of my groceries they should never stop fearing me.
— sween

So weird to know Santa Claus is hibernating in a coffin right now.
— badbanana

“Ic i stille þære worulde and mielte mid sīe” –Old English. “I wilt stoppe ye world & mealte with thee.” –Middle English.
— KenJennings

Such a beautiful day in London this morning. After so much wind and snow: sunshine, at last. They say Aslan is on the move.
— twhiddleston