The Art of Darkness

Seen Online

August 28th, 2021 by Cobwebs

Sir Gawain and the Green Knight explores one of the oldest and most profound narrative archetypes, to wit: “What if there was this really weird guy who showed up?”

I want to donate my body for science but not like science science like I wanna end up in the music department seeing if my skeleton really does make xylophone sounds

Don’t be envious of people who are more successful than you. Focus instead on your own creative ability to sculpt eerily lifelike wax dolls of those people and stick pins in them.

writing a predator movie where you finally see the predator home planet and it’s like a richard scarry town where there are predators riding to work in little apple cars and shit

[crime scene]
detective: who outlined the body?
me: i did
detective: why did you draw his eyebrows
me: he was surprised by the stabbing

umm heart disease kills millions of people a year so maybe focus on that instead of being mad at me for killing 1-2 people a year max?

It’s always the same with you: “Blood for the Blood God!” “Skulls for the Skull Throne!” Well what about my needs, An’ggrath the Unbound? What about “Flowers for Melissa, My Lovely and Supportive Wife”

Noise complaint.
911 caller says the vegetarian werewolves that live next door are howling as they dismember and devour their baked potatoes.

interviewer: you have a 3 year gap on your resume that just says “vengeance”
me: you don’t remember me do you?

wife: how was guarding the two paths today, honey?
guard: [looking away] fine
wife: did something happen?
the guard: [tearing up] no
wife: would the other guard tell me something happened?

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