The Art of Darkness

Seen Online

October 15th, 2019 by Cobwebs

Bard: “What’s all this?”
Paladin: “The druid is in time-out.”
Bard: “What’d you do?”
Druid: “I was selling a gluten-free organic all-natural weight-loss thing.”
Bard: “And?”
Druid: “It was just hungry wolves. Lots of ’em.”
Paladin: “DO NOT GIGGLE AT THE DRUID’S ATROCITIES.”
boomer_kid

No one ever talks about how an oubliette implies the existence of a larger, and far more terrifying, oobly.
Brainmage

[job interview]
interviewer: so god killed all your kids?
job: that’s right
DanMentos

Zdzisław Beksiński: So first I’ll paint some happy little trees
Beksiński: maybe a little bush
Beksiński: now a crumbling gothic cathedral covered in a pulsing web of arteries
Beksiński: you know, whatever makes you happy
midnight_pals

My housemates are convinced our house is haunted
I don’t get it. I’ve lived here for 273 years and not noticed anything strange.
badjokesbyjeff

The fandom surrounding Pennywise as a character feels really weird considering Pennywise does not exist whatsoever in-canon and is only one of many, many illusory avatars invented on the fly by the Deadlights to eat people with. Yall think you’re thirsty for a baby eating clown but really just want to bang an alien’s novelty chopstick collection.
bogleech

every morning our cat moves her toys from the bedroom to the living room while screaming, and every night she moves them back, also while screaming. i don’t know the purpose of the ritual but it is the central pillar of my faith
paranaturalzack

WIZARD: demon I have summoned you to instruct me in the carnal arts
SUCCUBUS: *hands textbook* turn to page 23
[5 HOURS LATER]
SUCCUBUS: and that covers STDs, bringing us to protection. do you still have the ritual banana I gave you?
WIZARD: ☹️ yes
deathbybadger

[Lord Byron after Percey Shelley died]
hey guys
you think maybe I could keep his skull?
just as a keepsake
not going to do anything weird with it like turn it into a goblet or something
oh these? yea ok yes these are my skull goblets, from a totally unrelated thing
DanaSchwartzzz

i wish dwarves were real just because the folk metal they would produce would be completely unfathomable
tripropellant

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A Link Dump Grows in Brooklyn

October 11th, 2019 by Cobwebs

Squirming Mommy Munchers – One of Bogleech’s wonderful Weird Biology series, this one about caecilians.

BareBumShop – Etsy shop specializing in soap and bath bombs, many of them with spooky themes.

ao3 tags – A delightful Twitter account that logs interesting tags from Archive of Our Own works. I especially like, “non-consensual knife play, also known as stabbing,” “Slightly canon compliant if canon had a demon tossed into it,” and “let perry the platypus say fuck.”

Christmas with Krampus – Kickstarter for Krampus-themed wrapping paper, ornaments, and greeting cards.

The Fisher of Bones – Sarah Gailey’s novelette is available for free online.

Death of the Firstborn Egyptians – A cute animation and catchy tune about one of the Biblical plagues. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie, who finds the best stuff)

The Best Places Around the World to See Bats (by the Millions) – I am all in for bat tourism.

20 Years Later, and the Women of Angel Still Deserve More – “The deaths of Darla, Fred, and Cordelia Chase were a waste.” Damn straight, they were.

31 Days ‘Til Halloween – After a long absence, Dave Lowe is blogging again and is counting down the days to Halloween with spooky sketches.

Calamityware Now What? Series – Calamityware has a kickstarter for a new set of designs. (Hat tip to Bruno)

Posted in Link Dump | 3 Comments »

Abbott & Costello Meet the Link Dump

October 4th, 2019 by Cobwebs

Nightmare Service Dogs – I love this sweet little illustration.

Modern Monster Mash – An update of the perennial favorite, with newer horror characters. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

Chicken Familiar – A scholarly dissertation on which breed of chicken would make the best Therapy Chicken for a wizard.

Our Fake History – “A podcast about myths we think are history and history that might be hidden in myths!” (Hat tip to Bruno)

Short Story Suggestions – Horror writer Cassandra Khaw has a thread of recommended short stories, all of which are excellent.

Calaveras Mittens – Knitting pattern for great-looking skully mittens. I especially love the design on the thumbs.

Absinthe Thread – @spookperson tweets about her adventures in making homemade absinthe.

The God of War – A great response to a writing prompt.

Vampire Pumpkins – This ‘toon about a Serbian superstition puts The Great Pumpkin in a whole new light.

Hex the Patriarchy – Attractive T-shirt with an inspiring message. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

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