The Art of Darkness

When Link Dumps Collide

December 30th, 2011 by Cobwebs

Mini Folk Charm Necklace – I like the idea of this “teeny figures in bottles” necklace, but I’d either paint them like zombies or replace them with something like miniature tombstones.

The Metamorphosis of Prime Intellect – Science fiction novella dealing with a future where everyone is immortal, so “death jockeys” die elaborately and painfully for sport. (Beware: highly graphic in places.)

Praying Mantis Phone Sex – This made me giggle.

How to Make Clothing Buttons from Shrink Plastic – Fantastic tutorial for creating custom buttons. There are all kinds of dark possibilities.

The Chirurgeon’s Apprentice – “A website dedicated to the horrors of pre-anaesthetic surgery.” I heart modern medicine.

Cap’n Wacky’s Boatload of Evil – Includes the amusing “Gallery of Unfortunate Halloween Cards,” a bunch of lists with titles like, “Signs You May be a Werewolf,” and other assorted silliness.

Alien Facehugger Pillow Set – Tutorial for making plush xenomorphs. Not bad for a human.

Macrame Owl – Organization “dedicated” to saving the declining populations of macrame owls. I especially like their Rescue page.

Cthulhu Dice – Quick-playing dice game, the goal of which is to be the last one sane. Reviews suggest that the dice make a nice expansion for other games as well. The related Zombie Dice looks cute too. (Hat tip to Sisifo)

D&D Coloring Book – Downloadable scans of a splendid coloring book from the heyday of Dungeons & Dragons. Time to dig out my crayons.

Posted in Link Dump | 3 Comments »

Better New Year’s Resolutions

December 29th, 2011 by Cobwebs

You know what’s wrong with New Year’s Resolutions? Other than the fact that we’re choosing a completely arbitrary division of time to determine when we should try to improve our lives? They’re boring. Lose weight? Boring. Save money? Boring. Get more sleep? Bo-ring.*

I’m thinking that in addition to these sorts of meat-and-potatoes resolutions, everybody needs to make a really fun, frivolous one. Something that isn’t too expensive or time-consuming that perhaps you’ve thought about doing but never attempted because it would be out of character for you, or you don’t know how to get started, or you’re worried about what the neighbors would think, or you just can’t muster the motivation, or [fill in your favorite excuse here].

So here’s what I want you to do: Come up with something within your time and budget constraints that you’d really like to do, and resolve to do that thing this year. Think less “long-term self-improvement” and more “this sounds like fun.” Research the perfect design for a tattoo you’ve always wanted. Dye your hair some outrageous shade. Plan and throw a really good Halloween party. Add at least one spooky accent to a decorating scheme. Plant an herb garden and use miniature tombstones as plant markers. You get the idea.

My goal is to learn to play the ukulele. What’s yours?

*Note that I didn’t say these things weren’t necessary. I said they were boring.

Posted in Whatever | 6 Comments »

Fake Anything

December 28th, 2011 by Cobwebs

Miami SliceI am a sucker for “fake reality” products like Last Exit to Nowhere’s T-shirts and the various 826 Stores’ wares, so I was most pleased to stumble across Fake Anything.

They describe themselves as a, “creative consortium dedicated to visionary interpretations of mythic media references,” which essentially means that they create representations of everything from Buffalo Bill’s Body Lotion to Sarlacc Warning Signs.

Best of all, they want you to play too:

If you’re an artist or designer, and you need release – release it on us.
If we like it, we post it. We’ll make you fake famous.

So if you’ve ever had the desire to design a business card for Herman Munster or a Yellow Pages ad for the Bates Motel, now’s your chance. There’s a whole community of like-minded artists who’d love to see your stuff.

Posted in Whatever | 1 Comment »

The Cemetery Club

December 27th, 2011 by Cobwebs

Cemetery Club LogoI’m a big fan of cemeteries, so I was pleased to discover the Cemetery Club site. Its tagline is, “Where cemeteries come to life and cemetery fans come together,” and although it’s somewhat on the sparse side content-wise, it’s got some good resource links and information about things like tomb rubbings.

It’s also home to Epitaphs, an online magazine devoted to old cemeteries. The magazine accepts submissions, so if you have an article, photograph, or book review this might be a good place to get some exposure.

The site owner also maintains a couple of relevant pages on Facebook, one for the magazine and one called Grave Book which features, “Headstones, Cemeteries, Abandoned Buildings and Haunted Houses.”

If you’re fond of graveyardy things–and if you aren’t, you’re definitely on the wrong blog–go check ’em out.

(via The Gothic Tea Society)

Posted in Resources | No Comments »

Brace Yourselves

December 26th, 2011 by Cobwebs

This isn’t goth, but you better believe it qualifies as horror.

The Star Wars Holiday Special has been spoken of in hushed tones in geek circles since its release. It was a naked cash grab by George Lucas trying to capitalize on the success of Star Wars, and it was so bad it damn near scuttled the movie franchise. No really. As Rob over on Topless Robot, where I found this turkey, put it:

The Star Wars Holiday Special is an atrocity against god and man. You think it’s going to be so bad it’s good, but it’s not — it’s so bad that nothing in life ever seems quite as good again.

He’s not kidding, you guys. Bea Arthur runs the Mos Eisley Cantina (and sings!). Diahann Carroll is a virtual reality sex slave for Wookiees. Han Solo is oddly huggy. Leia is clearly drugged out of her mind. It’s…special.

And here’s the whole damn thing, complete with commercials from 1978. You are welcome.

(via Topless Robot)

Posted in Funny Peculiar | 4 Comments »

Happy Holidays!

December 25th, 2011 by Cobwebs

However you celebrate, I hope today is lovely.

(Video courtesy of The Jonathan Coulton Project, dedicated to making music videos out of Coulton’s music.)

Posted in Funny Peculiar | 1 Comment »

Brave New Link Dump

December 23rd, 2011 by Cobwebs

Mesmerizing Cinemagraph Illusion – This is nicely creepy.

Bite Me – Vampire-fang bottle opener.

Downton Abbey Flat – Article about a woman who has gone Full Victorian in a one-bedroom flat in Leicester. The text has a bit of that point-and-laugh-at-the-weirdo vibe that this kind of piece tends to display, but the photos are lovely. (Hat tip to LimeyFish)

Memento Mori Watch – It’s a shame this is just a concept design because I would buy this so hard.

DeathPop Club – Bubblegum-type bands get a deathrock logo makeover.

Edible Wands – Instructions for making edible Harry Potter-style wands that will (depending on the type you make) change color when dipped in a liquid, glow under black light, or turn your tongue colors when eaten.

Kawaii Smartie Skulls – Cute little skull-shaped jello shots, with links at the bottom to previous recipes for spooky jello shots.

20 Rejected Horror Movie Posters – An amusing roundup.

X-Rays – Artist Wim Delvoye makes unusual stained-glass windows incorporating X-rays.

Twilight Blow Dryer – You guys, society has officially jumped the shark. Start stocking up on canned food and ammunition now.

Posted in Link Dump | 5 Comments »

Secret Santa Exchange List

December 22nd, 2011 by Cobwebs

Our third Secret Santa Can Suck It exchange was heaps of fun, and everybody outdid themselves with their gift ideas. Below is a list of all the participants: Go take a look at all the splendid virtual gifts!



pdq doesn’t have a blog, so I’m posting her gift for xJane here.

For xJane: a small home makeover in an All-Things Cthulhu vein.

For the dining room, a lovely chandelier to eat calamari by.

For the living room, a spectacular octopus coffee table to park her re-animation beverages on of a morning.

Then there’s the reading room. If she doesn’t have one, I’m giving her an addition to house one so that she may park herself on her lovely octopus chair (with her Cthulhu scuffs nomming her soles) and read the entire collection of H. P. Lovecraft’s work. I’m throwing in the many Cthulhu-cycle stories by other authors, like Neil Gaiman’s A Study in Emerald because they are sooooooo good.

Her bedroom is in need of these sheets and such, and a necklace completes it all.

Happy Solstice, and a very scary one, to xJane and all the regulars at Shadow Manor :)

Posted in Whatever | 6 Comments »

The Midnight Archive

December 21st, 2011 by Cobwebs

Indie documentary producer Ron Thomas recently launched The Midnight Archive: A series of shorts which “aims to document the exotic, the strange, the eccentric and the truly unique.”

Often dark and always on the fringe, the series puts an honest look into some of the most fascinating people, places and artifacts that many people are wildly unfamiliar with. From a woman who mummifies pets to the largest collection of automata, the idea is for the subject matter to tell its own story and give the viewer just a taste of something ‘unusual’. No dramatic stings, no editorial drama – just the facts.

Here’s their original teaser:

Each episode is nicely bite-sized (around 5 minutes each), and there are six episodes posted on the site* so far. There doesn’t appear to be a schedule of upcoming additions, but you can sign up to receive email updates.

(Hat tip to Cat)

*Mini-rant: Grey text on a black background does not mean “edgy,” you guys. It means “hard to read.”

Posted in Whatever | 3 Comments »

Seen Online

December 20th, 2011 by Cobwebs

On the other hand, a zombie apocalypse would do wonders to clean up my Facebook friend list.

Roses are red, violets are red, sugar is red, I think I bled on my violets and sugar.

I know “Bambi” was just a movie, but I haven’t seen Bambi’s mom in any other movies and I’m starting to get worried.

Dear obituary writers…there is no way someone who is 90 years old can ‘die suddenly’.

Natural science: rhinoceros is to triceratops as Creed is to Slayer.

All of my horcruxes are cheese.

“Hey look my phone has full signal and my car started up just fine!” – dialogue in a very short horror movie

Twilight movies are like the girl version of watching the Superbowl. In that they can only be enjoyed when really drunk.
The Bloggess

Every year Santa appears in a sincere pumpkin patch and confuses the hell out of a small boy holding a blanket.

Last time I saw tiny tots with their eyes all aglow, i was in The Village of the Damned.
‎– JerryThomas (hat tip to xJane)

Posted in Funny Peculiar | 1 Comment »

« Previous Entries