The Art of Darkness

I Saw Three Link Dumps

November 30th, 2018 by Cobwebs

Dating Ghosts – Another Chuck Wendig/Sam Sykes thread of greatness.

Southern Weather Discovery – You can pore through historical logbooks from Antarctic sledging expeditions and ship voyages and help climate scientists at the same time.

Rogue Taxidermy – There’s a woman-led art scene which produces pieces resembling what would happen “if Disneyland and a natural history museum got together.” (Hat tip to Cat)

The Lady Hero’s Journey – This McSweeney’s piece is all too accurate.

The extraordinary life and death of the world’s oldest known spider – This article about a 43-year-old spider is fascinating. (Hat tip to Bruno)

Color in Elizabethan Dress – A list of the names of cloth colors commonly used in the 16th and early 17th centuries. Goose Turd Green sounds particularly accurate.

The Hidden Message of ‘Addams Family Values’ – An interview with some of the cast.

Monster Rap – I had no idea that Bobby “Boris” Pickett had attempted to parlay his hit with “Monster Mash” into an entire career. This is quite a thing. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

She Still Loves the Dragon – Odd, melancholy short story by Elizabeth Bear.

Welcome to the Witch Capital of Norway – Interesting article about Vardø, Norway (linked through MetaFilter for the comments). (Hat tip to Bruno)

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Seen Online

November 27th, 2018 by Cobwebs

THERAPIST: did you work on communication
1ST CERBERUS HEAD: they won’t share the ball
2ND: i want the ball
3RD: i would also like the ball
MelKassel

Ruined my day by realizing that the song Monster Mash is about a song called the Monster Mash and we’ve never actually heard that song.
ObscureGent

nasa employee: oh hey u guys are back early
astronaut: moon’s haunted
nasa employee: what?
astronaut: *loading a pistol and getting back on the rocket-ship* moon’s haunted
Dustinkcouch

10:20
10:25
10:21
10:23
10:22
– Parallel parking my time machine
TweetPotato314

Y’all ever flex on vampires by just walking into people’s homes uninvited
Rica_Bee

The veil is thin here. It’s thin everywhere. Of course it’s fucking thin. Who ever heard of a thick veil? That shit’s lightweight, even sheer.

Like, shit, Agatha. There’s a reason they don’t call it “the down comforter between worlds”.

glumshoe

Me: *destroys spider web
Spider: wow
Me: *puts up fake spider web
Spider: WOW
psybermonkey

Me: So Christ’s body is the bread?
Priest: yes
Me: and he rose from the grave
Priest: yes…
Me: because of the yeast?
Priest: no
Me: okay, none of this makes sense
Megatronic13

me with a tarot deck: i activate the hanged man’s special ability. this lets me draw the devil from my deck into my hand. next, i sacrifice the hanged man in order to summon death. with death on my field, the effect of my tower spell card lets me summon the devil from my hand,
yrgirlkv

People always throwing cursed objects into the sea hello, no that is how you get haunted sharks
jessokfine

When one door closes, lock it securely, along with all your other doors, before any inspirational quotes get in.
thewritertype

Posted in Funny Peculiar | 1 Comment »

It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Link Dumps

November 23rd, 2018 by Cobwebs

Beetle Coin Pouch – Cute little coin purses shaped like Stag and Hercules Beetles.

The Bela Session – Full release of Bauhaus’ first studio session from January 26 1979, where “Bela Lugosi’s Dead.” (Hat tip to Bruno)

Moth Couples Costume – This is pretty great.

10 Scary Short Stories You Can Read Online Now – A roundup.

The Silence Under Your Bed – Interactive horror anthology about “the strange, the spooky, the macabre.”

Stanley – This adorable little skeleton (and friends) by heathersketcheroos is charming. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

ABCs of D&D – Cute children’s book for teaching the alphabet. There’s also 123s of D&D to teach numbers.

Skin Like Porcelain Death – A nicely creepy short story involving porcelain dolls.

Someone write me a book… – I would absolutely read this book.

I Scream Sundae – This DIY costume is amazing. (Hat tip to Empress Pam)

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This Year’s Costumes

November 20th, 2018 by Cobwebs

Duo 1I’m a little late with the annual costume recap this time; my apologies to everyone who awaits the yearly post with great anticipation. (That’s all of you, right?)

This year Shadowboy and his friend jumped on the Steampunk bandwagon, which was fine with me…until I got to the welted pockets. I’ve been inching toward the line between “costume” and “bespoke tailoring” for a while now, and this time I vaulted clean over it.

The only parts of Shadowboy’s costume currently made by me were the vest and coat; since this is an ensemble he intends to use beyond just a single Halloween I plan to eventually make a shirt and trousers that are slightly more period-appropriate, but I didn’t have time before the big day.* The coat was Simplicity 2581 and the vest was Simplicity 2895. They had six welted pockets between them, and I don’t think that in this space I have ever adequately expressed the white-hot hatred I have for welted pockets but believe me, it is a lot. (This was compounded by the directions for 2895 being so inaccurate as to be nonsensical, so beware if you use that pattern.)

Since he does intend to wear the costume a lot I was also willing to splurge a little on accessories: A bow tie with neat little metallic points, the gear that shows up in all steampunk costumes as though required by federal law in the form of an earring, a spiffy top hat, and goggles. Those were joined by a cane, boots, and gauntlets we already had.

His friend’s costume consisted of jodhpurs from Butterick B6433 (not too complicated except for the nine bazillion buttons festooning the legs); a somewhat-modified Butterick 4049 (I did mostly View A, but instead of criss-cross lace on the front panel I used an elaborate pintuck fabric that unfortunately does not show up well in photos; I also added lace to the collar); and the half corset from Simplicity 1558, the other costume piece that made me consider giving up sewing to pursue a more stress-free hobby like naked lion taming. One of the suggested fabrics for the corset is “synthetic leather,” which is what I used, but apparently the subtext is, “synthetic leather that is as thin as muslin” because there is no way some of the directions work any other way. In particular, the shoulder straps and front tabs are all supposed to made of two pieces, sewn with right sides together and then turned. Um, no. I just turned under the raw edges of a single piece and edge-stitched them. (My doughty sewing machine didn’t really appreciate my foray into synthetic leather either.) The directions also call for “buckles” of a particular size without noting that the straps specifically require center bar rather than heel bar buckles. Fortunately I was able to find what I needed online from Buckle Guy.

Her accessories were mainly procured by her aunt so I can’t provide sources on those, but I did supply the fingerless gloves.

For all my whining, I was quite pleased with the final results. The costumes looked good and the photo shoot turned out really well: The kids look like a gentleman crime-fighter and his trusty pint-sized sidekick. (Shadowboy and his friend are only six months apart in age, and every year their size discrepancy gets more and more hilarious.)

The photos:

Boy 1
Boy 2

Girl 1

Duo 1
Duo 2

*I sewed the final buttons on his coat five minutes before the party he was supposed to wear it to started. These outfits damn near broke me.

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A Link Dump to Remember

November 16th, 2018 by Cobwebs

Local Haunts – Kickstarter for an anthology of comics featuring “small town legends, family ghost stories, and fears that span across cultures.” (Hat tip to Bruno)

Helpful Ghost – This Twitter thread is charming.

The Absinthe Enthusiasts Hiding Bottles in the Swiss Woods – I sort of love the idea of geocached absinthe. (Hat tip to Kitten Herder)

Edgar Allan Poe Votive Candle – Devotional candles featuring secular icons are a bit overdone these days, but the ones by this company are very nice.

Bread and Milk and Salt – Sarah Gailey writes very creepy stories.

The Pumpkin Came at Midnight – Subtitle: “An Erotic Abduction.” This short work of fiction is apparently what the Great Pumpkin gets up to in his off hours. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

The recipient of all those letters about Frankenstein writes back – Alexandra Petri tweeted, “just once I want to read the letter that the epistolary horror novel framing device guy gets BACK after sending 100 pages of nested narratives to his bewildered sister” and then followed up with a column imagining just that.

Adapted Austen – This thread of animal photos with Jane Austen quotes is much funnier than it should be.

Exploring Victorian London – Some amazing resources. (Hat tip to Bruno)

The Curious Case of LoLo Moreno – Award-winning short horror film.

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The Best Little Link Dump in Texas

November 9th, 2018 by Cobwebs

Lost Film Adaptation of The Tell-Tale Heart Discovered – A long-lost, intact copy of the short film was discovered in an attic. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

The Books That Made Dracula – Bram Stoker’s reference materials for Dracula have been found at the London Library, complete with notes he made.

Top 10 HallowSCREAM BOOvies – A YouTube watchlist. (Hat tip to Bruno)

Inktober 2018 – For this year’s #inktober artistic challenge, @genicecream polled followers on what details to add to a cozily spooky house.

What We Do in the Shadows Promo Spots – FX is launching a series based on the mockumentary of the same name. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

The Rose MacGregor Drinking and Admiration Society – A while back the estimable Ursula Vernon speculated about a human maiden who dallied with fae men and didn’t pine away afterwards. Then she wrote this amusing short story about it.

This is the Church You Go To – A hilarious thread of church architecture. (Hat tip to Bruno)

Dress Up for Halloween, Medieval Style – The British Library’s Medieval Manuscripts blog has some tips.

Cauldron Cake – This is one of those decorating ideas that looks like it might be juuuuust within the realm of possibility for someone who isn’t a professional baker, but will probably end in tears for most of us. There’s a short “making of” video here. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

A Few Small Haunted Houses – This artwork is wonderfully evocative.

Posted in Link Dump | 3 Comments »

Link Dump of Capricorn

October 26th, 2018 by Cobwebs

Sutter Cane’s Perilous Peninsula – Neat little “one page dungeon” adventure location for RPGs, featuring places like “Yokel Shacks” and “Dilapidated Mansion.” (Hat tip to Bruno)

Hero Forge – This company allows you to customize D&D miniatures and then have them 3D printed for you.

Loot Fright – LootCrate has spun off a horror subscription box.

If I Encounter One More Trade Name For a Gemstone or Other Attractive Mineral I Will Puke – This isn’t exactly goth, but if you’re interested in gemstones for either crafting or metaphysical purposes, it’s a really interesting read.

Stoning Our Neighbors to Death Makes the Corn Grow High, and Elitist Liberals Should Stop Attacking This Traditional Value – In the “too true to be funny” department….

Dragons of Wales – The @dragonsofwales Twitter feed is full of delightful little dragon illustrations, and you can purchase calendars and other items in their Etsy shop.

Vampire Fang Collection – Tutorial for an easy prop.

Submitterator Extraordinaire Pixel Pixie went on a tear and sent me several noteworthy videos this week:
Visiting the Edward Gorey House – Stuck in Vermont tours the house Gorey lived in for the last 14 years of his life.

Professor Peabody’s Last Lecture – This episode of Night Gallery stars Rob Reiner and a lot of green yarn.

The Legend of Sleepy Hollow – Jeff Goldblum starred as Ichabod Crane in a low-budget TV movie and it is just as Jeff Goldblum-y as anyone could hope.

Posted in Link Dump | 4 Comments »

Requiem for a Link Dump

October 19th, 2018 by Cobwebs

Casting Spells – Tutorial for making vintage-look tea stained table napkins printed with faux witches’ spells.

Polly Pocket Addams Family – This li’l custom-made playset is utterly adorable.

Blood Bag Party Cups – These food-safe “blood bag” containers are perfect for a Halloween party.

deathcap – “my therapist suggested I try exploring my anxieties in fiction rather than autobiography, so here is a depressed mushroom.” This series of ‘toons is delightful.

Animal X-rays – These X-rays from the Oregon Zoo look like art prints.

The Simpson’s Too Short Story – This Simpsons filler piece done in the style of Edward Gorey is splendid. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

#31skirtsofoctober – Instagrammer avintagevanity is making a different Halloweeny skirt every day in October.

STET – Part of the impact of Sarah Gailey’s chilling short story is in its brilliant formatting.

Florida Man as Lady Voldemort – Drag queen Florida Man dresses as “Lady Voldemort” to lipsync Ariana Grande’s “Dangerous Woman.” Is a sentence I never thought I’d write. (Hat tip to Bruno)

The Nightmare Before Dinner – Zach Neil, creator of Halloween-themed restaurant Beetle House, has written a cookbook. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

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Seen Online

October 16th, 2018 by Cobwebs

The reason sex with a vampire doesn’t usually result in pregnancy isn’t because their sperm is dead, it’s because the vampire can’t come inside without an invitation.

Thank you for coming to my HaunTED Talk.

alexandraerin

“I’m lonely,” she said, “do you have a potion for making friends?”
“Sure. Drink this,” the witch said.
“Tea?”
“Yep. What’s on your mind?”
ASmallFiction

I notice Autumn is more the season of the soul than of nature.
— Friedrich Nietzsche

A vampire bat’s stomach quickly absorbs all the water out of the blood it drinks, and they pee while feeding to offload it. So. That fog people associate with vampires is probably pee mist. Or they carry a change of pants.
Megiavelli

It’s the zombie apocalypse!

Most people are working on taking out zombies, finding shelter or escaping the city, but not your party.

You’ve got a bunch of spray-cans and it is your duty to spray ominious, cryptic graffiti everywhere to make sure that the ruins fully fit the genre.

probablybadrpgideas

hey, I just met Zeus
and this is crazy
but he’s a swan and
I’m having babies
roboticcrab

dr frankenstein: it’s alive
dr frankenstein: speak
monster: am i the product of peer reviewed research
dr frankenstein: uh
monster: do you have the paperwork with the sources of all my body parts
dr frankenstein: well no
monster: good god this lab is pile of osha violations
wawoodworth

It’s an open secret that all archaeologists, librarians, curators, book dealers and archivists are secret agents. When we say “out of the office”, we mean “screaming GIVE ME THE OTHER HALF OF THE AMULET to a rival whilst battling with them on the edge of a waterfall”
Sotherans

if you’re ever feeling alone just remember that aladdin’s best friends were a monkey and a rug
savittj

Potential pantheon of old ones for our D&D campaign, as named by the resident creepy child NPC:
Mr. Watches You In The Corner
Old Lady Spiders Inside
The Lumpy One
Nobody Is There
Just, Like, A Cat
The Fish With No Eyes
Forever Screaming With A Candle
Sharp Teddy
Mother Squish
alexandraerin

Posted in Funny Peculiar | 1 Comment »

Link Dump Descending a Staircase

October 12th, 2018 by Cobwebs

belovedlittlelamb – Etsy shop featuring unusual jewelry like earthworm bracelets and bird foot earrings.

Scorpion Chair – This chair by Vyacheslav Pakhomov is simply gorgeous.

Grim Grinning Ghosts – Nice arrangement of the Haunted Mansion theme. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

Chicken – I love this behind-the-scenes look at Baba Yaga.

Who is Dead? – An interesting look at the historical difficulty of making sure somebody dead wasn’t really just mostly dead. (Hat tip to Bruno)

Corseted Leather Top Hat Tutorial – If you’re feeling ambitious, this DIY steampunk top hat is amazing.

Plush Beetles – @MothMonarch is going to order a case of adorable Japanese plush beetles if there’s enough interest.

British Museum Blog – The venerable museum’s blog is full of all kinds of neat stuff

Free Halloween Reads – Tor Books is sharing free horror fiction all month.

The History League – Faux-sports team T-shirts featuring logos based on interesting historical events. I especially like the headless-but-feisty “‘Divorcees’ of Henry VIII.”

Posted in Link Dump | 1 Comment »

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