The Art of Darkness

Beauty and the Link Dump

March 31st, 2017 by Cobwebs

Something in the Blood – A new biography of Bram Stoker.

Spider Lamp – I’m annoyed to have to post a Facebook link, but this piece doesn’t appear on the artist’s site or Etsy shop. This steampunky nightlight is lovely.

You’ll Be Safe Here – A lovely image which pays tribute to all of geekdom.

My Backyard Monsters – Weird little crocheted things, many with free patterns. Who doesn’t need a miniature Kodama or a taxidermy deer butt?

Medieval Weapons Ice Tray – I’m not sure how practical these would be for keeping drinks cold, but they’re pretty neat anyway.

Dragons Like You Don’t Usually See Them – Some adorable dragon illustrations.

Road Sign Tarot – An amusing Tumblr exchange. I’d like to see somebody do a real tarot deck like this.

Nautilidae – Knitting pattern for an awesome chambered nautilus.

Bride of Frankenstein Doll – Artist Suzanne Forbes made a dynamite “gothic burlesque” costume for a poseable Bride doll. This would be a great Halloween costume.

The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas – Ursula K. Le Guin’s beautifully depressing classic short story.

Posted in Link Dump | 3 Comments »

Dr. Link Dump and Mr. Hyde

March 24th, 2017 by Cobwebs

Fireproof Faux Human Skulls – Pile a bunch of these in your fireplace to make houseguests nervous. Also available in white.

Fiber – Short story by Seanan McGuire, narrated by a teenage former zombie.

Longswords Are Not “Manly” – An interesting dissection of various types of swords.

Agents of Sin – Some interesting concept art for soldiers paired with various Deadly Sins. Reminds me a bit of Jim Butcher’s Denarians.

Call of Cthulhu Metal Dice Set – Kickstarter for some amazingly intricate dice, complete with teensy tentacles.

Etiquette & superstition: voluntary and involuntary surrender of cream – Instructions on how to pass the cream and also how to steal it if you’re a witch. (Hat tip to pdq)

All the Bats – Amusing ‘toon. I like Steve.

Crying Unicorn Candle – Light the candle, and the ceramic unicorn weeps rainbow-colored tears out of its empty eyesockets like it’s just looked at the Ark of the Covenant.

Tamberlane – Sweet webcomic about a clumsy bat who takes in a baby. There’s a Kickstarter for a print run.

Everything That Will Kill You, from A to Z – A marvelously Gorey-esque video. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

Posted in Link Dump | 3 Comments »

The Link Dump Resists

March 17th, 2017 by Cobwebs

Obsolete Scientific Theories – …that would make good heavy metal band names. Heh.

Hidden Hearts – Winsomely creepy hollowed-out dolls with dioramas inside.

Please Don’t Tell My Parents I’m a Supervillain – The first in a series of YA novels about a normal middle-schooler who happens to be a supervillain.

The Chronic Argonauts – H.G. Wells book free online at Project Gutenberg. (Hat tip to DeVries)

10 Best ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ Episodes of All Time – A roundup over which to quibble.

Lorica Leggings – There’s a Kickstarter for historically-accurate Medieval armor leggings.

Stay Safe – An amusing comic by Iguanamouth. (Hat tip to Pixel Pixie)

Superman vs. Clark Kent – This isn’t really goth but I like it because it makes so much sense.

The Yorick Project – Build notes for hacking Amazon Alexa to speak out of an animated skull.

my dude looks like the babadook – This epic, epic (over 100 tweets so far) thread by Goth Ms. Frizzle is sublime.

Posted in Link Dump | 1 Comment »

Seen Online

March 14th, 2017 by Cobwebs

Cactus are the most antisocial plant, they grow in the middle of the desert and still like, “Don’t fucking come near me”. #Showerthoughts
rShowerThoughts

Always a bridesmaid, never the voice that mysteriously bleeds from the corner of your bedroom wall.
gothicaseas

Hodor and Groot on a date trying to order food
biorhythmist

I fry all my mythological creatures in gargoyle.
Yeah yeah, I’m leaving.
E_lok44

me: [flashlight under chin] they say a witch cursed this house 100 years ago today!
[100 years ago]
witch: fuck this house
malt_skull

Hobbit cozy mysteries could actually be a thing.
LOBELIA GETS THE SACK
MURDER IN THE MATHOM-HOUSE
A SHORTCUT TO MUSHROOM POISONING
scottlynch78

Archaeologists, 300 years from now, excavating my skeleton:
“what’s that thing that she’s holding?”
“That, I believe, is a grudge”
kchurchie

you find a mad libs book on the ground and find that it’s filled completely with proper, sensible words for the situation at hand. a small child in a perfectly tailored gray suit tugs on your shirt with ice-cold hands and politely asks for it back
korolevx

why do i have to be asleep to eat spiders
painted_eel

Horror movies should include bloopers, so after watching the main film you’ll be able to sleep #Showerthoughts
rShowerThoughts

Posted in Funny Peculiar | 1 Comment »

A Link Dump’s Purpose

March 10th, 2017 by Cobwebs

Spring Fever – This Hot Topic ad and the accompanying commentary are heartwarming.

The Order of the Thinned Veil – A “society of like-minded individuals who choose to live our lives steeped in the legends, lore and customs of Halloween.” In other words, our kind of people.

The Blackcoat’s Daughter – io9 reviews a promising-sounding horror movie.

CollectedEdition – Etsy shop specializing in lovely 3D-printed metal jewelry, including thorns and insects.

Steampunk Astrolabe Table – Astonishingly, this gorgeous thing is 3D artwork rather than a physical device. I want a real one.

Xenomorph Tiki Mugs – “In space, no one can hear you drink.”

Horrors Beyond Belief! – A reading guide for Emily Carroll’s horror comics.

Help Transcribe Phyllis Diller Jokes – The Smithsonian is crowdsourcing help for transcribing Diller’s enormous card catalogue of over 52,000 jokes. (You need a goth connection? Diller voiced “The Monster’s Mate” in the classic Mad Monster Party.)

Western – Artist Roman Chaliy mixes old-West iconography with the undead, resulting in skeletal gunslingers and other neat images.

Writing Prompt – Most likely based on this legendary Tumblr post, a recent Reddit prompt was, “In the canine world, humans are celestial beings who live for more than 500 years at a time. The caretaker of you and the past seven generations of your family will die soon.” Beware the onion-chopping ninjas infesting the thread. (Hat tip to xJane)

Posted in Link Dump | No Comments »

MicroSFF: Monsters Under the Bed

March 7th, 2017 by Cobwebs

The @MicroSFF Twitter feed is a trove of wonderful, tiny stories.

The author recently said that he was thinking about this tweet:

…and followed up with this marvelous thread:

On a similar note, and not-coincidentally, right after the U.S. election, the account tweeted these gems:

queenofthedorks liked that one so much that she illustrated it.

What I’m saying is that @MicroSFF does monsters-under-the-bed right and you should totally follow them.

Posted in Whatever | 1 Comment »

Killer Link Dumps From Outer Space

March 3rd, 2017 by Cobwebs

The Widow’s Jar – Amazingly detailed automaton by Thomas Kuntz. Slightly NSFW. (via Poopisan)

I Love Bat Cookies – Adorable bat-themed cookies, with some proceeds going to help bat conservation.

Vlad – This made me laugh entirely too hard.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer Merchandise – To celebrate the upcoming 20th(!!!) anniversary of Buffy, YahooTV has a look at some clothing and other merch. (Oh god I feel old.)

Aethiocarenus burmanicus – This Cretaceous insect is described by Gizmodo as “Quite Possibly the Ugliest Bug Ever Found Trapped in Amber.” I think it looks more like it was drawn by Edward Gorey.

The Tea Dragon Society – A sweet, serene little webcomic about tea dragons. (Which makes sense in context I swear.)

Each night Father fills me with dread – I don’t know where this poem/illustration is from, but I dig it.

Felted Anatomical Specimens – Artist Lana Crooks makes amazingly-detailed anatomical specimens out of silk and wool. (Hat tip to pdq)

Pojo’s Pure Vermont Soap – They sell “normal” soap like goat milk and honey…and also Garlic & Holy Water Vampire Repelling Soap, Silver & Holy Water Werewolf Repelling Soap, zombie-themed SOAPOCALYPSE and some other weird stuff. The vampire soap comes with a money-back guarantee if you’re attacked by a vampire, so there’s that.

The Big Scary Show – Podcast for fans of the “big three ‘H’s (Halloween, Horror, and Haunted Houses).”

Posted in Link Dump | 7 Comments »

Alas, A Link Dump

February 24th, 2017 by Cobwebs

Ann Arbor’s Fairy Doors – Ann Arbor, MI is home to a collection of fairy doors.

Light + Paper – Site which sells intricate, delicate paper cutouts, many in the shape of human organs.

LirikasByLirika – Etsy shop specializing in tights, gloves, and other accessories embellished with jewels and applique patches. Dark Forest and Wild Cherries are particularly appealing.

British Retro – Reproduction vintage clothing with fantastic style.

The Scariest Animal That Will Never Hurt You – Yay, whipscorpions! I especially like the photo of the mother carrying around its young. (Hat tip to DeVries)

Our Talons Can Crush Galaxies – Nebula Award Finalist Brooke Bolander’s short story is available online for free.

Useless Creatures (and Why They Matter) – Screwworm flies and cuttlefish are just as worthy of saving as polar bears.

Pet Flytrap – Sells a variety of carnivorous plants (including rare and unusual cultivars), terrarium kits, and supplies. Their sampler pack is a nice way to get started.

Animatronic Cat Ears – Instructions for making moveable cat ears. The same idea could easily be used for horns, antennae, or tentacles.

Fantasy Novel Title Generator – Stumped for a title for that big, fat, derivative fantasy novel you just extruded? Have no fear! This generator pumps out surprisingly plausible titles.

Posted in Link Dump | 4 Comments »

The Link Dump of Shalott

February 17th, 2017 by Cobwebs

#RejectedSpells – Amusing Twitter hashtag. I like, “Detect Magic Johnson” and “Comprehend Difference Between Your and You’re.”

Geeky Sex Toys – Unicorn horn dildos, Green Lantern cock rings, and much else. NSFW. Duh.

Beauty and Lord Voldemort – A mashup trailer of greatness.

How Fleetwood Mac Invented Goth – Uhm?

Crazy Yearbook Quotes From Students Back in 1911 – Smartasses are eternal. Also Alice Winslow is my spirit animal.

Wisconsin Death Trip – This account of the misfortunes surrounding the town of Black River Falls is a horror movie waiting to happen, although they’ll have to change the town name to something a little less obvious-sounding. (via Beans)

Gregorian Voices – Online Gregorian chant generator. Also available as a free app.

Lore – Podcast about true-life scary stories.

Coexisting With The Fair Folk Who Have Taken Up Residence In/Around/Beneath Your University: A How-To Guide – This ‘toon (and the accompanying notes) are splendid. (Update: Someone was inspired to create a university newsletter.)

The Midnight Screecher – Despite sounding like a sex act, this is a suggested “entertainment” from an 1873 book entitled What Shall We Do To-Night?. I don’t know what that head piece is made out of.

Posted in Link Dump | 2 Comments »

Somebody Write This

February 15th, 2017 by Cobwebs

There was a recent thread on AskReddit: Night shift workers of Reddit, what are some creepy things you’ve experienced in the middle of the night?

Redditor xelle24 told this creepy story:

My brother moved in with me a few months ago and got a job doing night shift custodial work at a nearby high school. His “workday” starts at 10 pm, and fortunately for him, it’s close enough to walk, because he gets off shift about 20 minutes after I have to leave for work in the morning, and he doesn’t have a car.

One night, a little after midnight, he calls me in a panic asking me to come down and pick him up, because there’s some kind of ‘weird shit’ happening (his exact words) and there’s no way he’s sticking around by himself. My brother isn’t the sort to freak out over nothing, so I hop in the car (in my jammies) and head down to the high school.

A little background is needed here: as children, my brother was apparently “sensitive”. He often talked about various seemingly supernatural encounters. In one very old house we lived in, he told our parents that a man would come to his room at night and tell him bedtime stories. It wasn’t until we were grown up that our father told us that a distant relative had committed suicide in the same room that was my brother’s bedroom, years before either of us was born, and that my brother’s description of the man matched the deceased relative.

I’m the exact opposite. Nothing creepy or supernatural ever happens to me or around me. If it happened there before, it doesn’t happen when I’m there, and often doesn’t return after I leave. I’ve had enough perplexed people tell me that their ghost went away after I visited their house, or that a particular place stopped being creepy after I was there, or had someone acting crazy calm down when I talked to them, to be pretty sure that I’m some kind of natural repellent for creepy shit.

So I get to the high school, and my brother is standing by the front doors. He runs over to the car and tells me that I have to come and make “it” stop.

“It” was the sound of lockers opening and closing just out of sight. He would turn a corner of a hallway and hear a locker open and slam closed behind him, or around the corner of the next hallway.

We go into the school, my brother practically hanging on my arm (which probably looked hilarious, as I’m shorter and plump, and he’s tall and super skinny – like a modern version of Laurel and Hardy). We walk up and down all the halls. Nothing happens. No sounds, no movement, no lockers opening or closing. No cold spots, no inexplicable drafts, no creepy noises or feelings.

We walk down the last hallway, at which point it getting on for 1 am and I’m tired and just want to go back home. There’s one locker standing ajar, and as we approach it, my brother reaches out to close it, pulls his hand back, and says, “You do it.”

I close the locker. Nothing happens.

Finally my brother says I can go, as long as I promise to come back the next night if there are any more problems.

A week later, he comes home and hands me a thank you note and a $50 Amazon gift card from the head of the custodial department for “services rendered”.

Easiest 50 bucks I’ve ever made.

And necropoli followed up with this reply:

You guys sound like sibling ghost hunter team but you have to work together to exorcise ghosts. Only one of you can see them and only one can dispel them. The tension comes from your brother seeing your dead wife as a ghost but you know you can never see her lest you exorcise her by being in the room. The burgeoning relationship between your brother and your ex-wife you can’t bring yourself to destroy drives a wedge in between your well-oiled ghost hunting operation. On the eve of Halloween, no less!

It’ll be a heartwrenching instaclassic with Oscar written all over it. I want 20% of the box office KTHX

I need this movie immediately. And then spin it off into a TV series. It would be spectacular.

Posted in Whatever | 2 Comments »

« Previous Entries Next Entries »