The Art of Darkness

A Letter to the Caretaker

February 3rd, 2007 by Cobwebs

To: Caretaker, Shadow Manor
From: Fishbein, Fishbein, Fishbein, and Hayakawa
Attorneys at Law

Tomb it May Concern:

The Saiberville Beautification Society has retained the services of our firm in response to certain violations of the neighborhood appearance guidelines by the denizens of your mansion.

Specific infractions include:

Incessant tormented shrieks of the damned, rattling chains, maniacal laughter, and guttural moans continuing after 11 p.m.

The nooses hanging from the large oak in your front yard have caused unsightly rope scarring on several of the tree’s limbs. This is a matter of some concern to several local environmental action groups, who suggest that you install a gallows.

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