Death is Not an Option
I’m feeling silly today, so I’m going to dust off a game that Kristabella used to play on her blog a few years back. The rules are simple: Given the choice of each pair of people below, irrelevant of gender, you have to pick which one you’d sleep with. Choosing death instead is not an option.
Let’s begin, shall we?
| The Classic Vampire Matchup | ||
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| Dracula Bela Lugosi | vs. | Dracula Gary Oldman |
| The Those Masks Have To Come Off Some Time Matchup | ||
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| Jason Voorhees | vs. | Michael Myers |
| The Hot TV Moms Matchup | ||
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| Lily Munster | vs. | Morticia Addams |
| The Vampire Hunter Matchup | ||
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| Blade | vs. | Van Helsing |
| The Tortured Gothic Poet Matchup | ||
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| Lord Byron | vs. | Edgar Allan Poe |
| The Creepy Dead Girl Matchup | ||
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| Kayako from The Grudge | vs. | Sadako from Ringu |
| The C’mere You Little Zipperneck Matchup | ||
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| Frankenstein’s Monster | vs. | Herman Munster |
| The Oh Hell No Matchup | ||
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| Pennywise | vs. | Pinhead |
| The Videogame Vixen Matchup | ||
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| Alice from Resident Evil | vs. | Rayne from Bloodrayne |
| The How About Both, Can I Choose Both Matchup | ||
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| Eric Northman | vs. | Alcide Herveaux |
Leave your choices in the comments (feel free to expand on why you made each choice). And remember…Death is not an option.
Posted in Funny Peculiar | 10 Comments »
March 13th, 2012 at 7:17 am
Bela Lugosi
Jason Voorhees
Morticia Adams
Can I choose both here too? PRETTY PLEASE? (Blade)
Lord Byron
Sadako
Munster
Pinhead (Ew, clowns.)
Alice
Yep, gonna have to choose both here again. >-> (Eric)
March 13th, 2012 at 7:36 am
Gary Oldman, because Bela Lugosi was genuinely terrifying and melodrama makes me laugh.
Jason Voorhees, because Michael Myers dressed as a clown to murder his first sister. AUTOMATIC DISQUALIFICATION.
Morticia Addams. DUH.
Oh god. Blade’s pretty, but so sullen. I’ve never seen Van Helsing, but it seems like he might be less sulky than Blade?
Poe. He may have had TB, but I suspect Byron had syphilis.
Sadako. But only if I could give her a manicure first.
Frankenstein’s monster, because the Munsters were not funny ever.
Pinhead? Clowns freak me out.
ALICE. ALICE IS BAD ASS.
Eric Northman? I don’t know, I closed my eyes and pointed at the screen.
March 13th, 2012 at 8:31 am
Gary Oldman…because I saw that movie 7 times in the theater and left a dizzy hormonal mess. The eyes, the accent. Just, yum
Jason…I like a man who is outdoorsy
Morticia…She clearly is the winner because she’s prettier
Van Helsing…he was just badass and fearless
Byron…because syphillis is a prettier word to say than tuberculosis
Sadako…yea
Frankensteins Monster…more well rounded
Pinhead…I echo the poster above…clowns…just, no, not ever
Alice…saucy
Both…because I want what I want
March 13th, 2012 at 12:57 pm
• Gary Oldman
• Knife to the face (not mine)
• Morticia Addams
• VAN HELSING!!! (DH and I did Van Helsing/Anna Valerious one year because he loves his duster and I love Kate Beckinsale)
• Byron. (to the syphilis/tuberculosis debate, I shall add: syphilis is more fun to catch)
• Fall asleep watching TV.
• That really depends on what we’d be doing in bed. Can I go with Young Frankenstein’s Monster? He go some moves!
• Pinhead.
• Both!
• eh. Deferred until I can see a photo where their muscles don’t look like the Governator.
March 13th, 2012 at 1:11 pm
Death should totally be an option. You could pick between Death from Discworld or Death from Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey, or between either of the aforementioned Deaths and Death from The Seventh Seal, or any of the aforementioned Deaths and the Death from the Endless pantheon, or between any of the aforementioned Deaths and Cake.
March 13th, 2012 at 2:20 pm
ooooh i love this game.
gary oldman. it would be fun to watch chevalier squirm as i describe sex with his god in excruciating detail. i am a terrible wife, but i’m fun at parties.
michael myers, because i like the way he pauses to reflect on occasion. rich interior life. also- i’d laugh at the shatner mask, and sex should be funny.
morticia is a sexy broad, while lily is just looney tunes. no contest.
blade. if you’d posted the anthony hopkins van helsing things might have gone differently, but if hugh jackman is even so much as bi i will eat my socks after a run. he would be passionless and uninteresting.
byron. mad, bad, and dangerous to know. sounds good for an evening, and terrible long term.
sadako, because otherwise i would scream like a little girl.
herman’s like a giant puppy that could be trained to do tricks. sometimes that is appealing.
pinhead. oddly, i always found him sexy. it may be the resemblance to billy corgan.
alice. absolutely.
difficult, but i’m in the mood for men with facial hair lately. so i go with alcide.
can we play this game all the time? i love it! may steal this one for my blog, but every matchup will be against an alan rickman character. too much? ; )
March 13th, 2012 at 2:30 pm
Gary Oldman – pop those shades and that hat off and there’s potential.
Jason Voorhees – rugged is hotter.
Lily Munster? I like Yvonne DeCarlo.
Van Helsing (I’m sorry, but I didn’t have to even think about this one.)
Lord Byron… I think…?
Hubs and I think Sadako seems to have a tad more potential. The huge eye thing creeps us both out.
Frankenstein’s Monster (Munster is in the friend zone with that grin.)
Having an even harder time with hell. It’s more like hail naw.
Um, Rayne?
Alcide resembles the hubs, I’ll take him! Although I’ve never had a blonde before…
And if Death is an option, I choose (Meet) Joe Black.
March 14th, 2012 at 1:08 am
Dracula Gary Oldman — he is way sexier than Bela Lugosi
Jason Voorhees — he seems manlier
Morticia Addams — she is way hot!
Van Helsing — no contest.
Edgar Allan Poe — I think he would be all brooding and romantic, it wouldn’t be until after that he got all crazy, and I don’t want the syph
Herman Munster — the other Frankie is scary
Pinhead — He is kind of hot, and I am terrified of clowns!
Alice from Resident Evil, although it was a hard choice, they are both beautiful.
Alcide Herveaux…or Eric..
March 15th, 2012 at 10:36 pm
Gary Oldman (nom nom nom)
Jason Voorhees. It seems we (mostly) all agree he’s the manlier option.
Morticia Addams. Holy hell, yes.
Van Helsing. Ohmigod yes.
Lord Byron, simply because I think with his reputation he should be good at it. Plus Poe seems like he’d be scared of everything.
Sadako. I really want to make a joke about her already being wet but I have too much class for that. Waaaay to much class *nods*
Frankenstein’s Monster. Herman always sort of creeped me out. He’s like Mr Rogers at Halloween.
Pinhead. Clowns would creep me out waaaaaaaaaay too much for anything good to come of that little tryst.
Alice. I mean, come on. It’s Milla Jovovich. This is Leeloo Dallas we’re talking about.
This was REEAAALY difficult, but I’m going with Alcide coz that facial hair is making me melt all over the keyboard.
We should definitely play this game more often. I like LimeyFish’s idea about choosing between Deaths as well.
March 22nd, 2012 at 9:45 am
They are both gorgeus
Jason Voorhees…his mask is better
Morticia Addams…she is so sexy
Van Helsing…I love this movie more than Blade
Edgar Allan Poe…
Sadako from Ringu…
Frankenstein’s Monster…hi is more original
Pinhead…hate clowns
Rayne from Bloodrayne…because she has red hair
Eric Northman…sexy sexy sexy