The Art of Darkness

Seen Online

June 26th, 2013 by Cobwebs

Every Scooby-Doo mystery could be solved by asking, “1: Who is your most disgruntled employee?” and “2: Does he have access to a mask shop?”

If I die, please avenge me. If it’s an accidental death, just go nuts on whoever.

instead of “thats what she said” start incorporating “thats how my grandma died” in its place

The meanest criminal ever would send back his last meal, just to ruin one final person’s day.

I want my hearse to have ‘JUST DIED’ written on the windshield with cans tied to the rear bumper.

I would describe my personal style as “this smelled clean.”

The song “Hush Little Baby” always has me wondering why they’re trying to buy this child’s silence? INFANT, WHAT DID YOU SEE?

Worried a serial killer might jump out from behind my shower curtain and start reading Twilight to me.

all you need to know about my thought process is that I recently screamed when I saw a sign on a restaurant that said ENDLESS CRAB LEGS

Instead of saying “in bed” at the end of my fortune, I say “but then, a pestilence will come…”

If anyone needs me, I’ll be at the hospital leaving robots and newspapers from the year 2310 in the rooms of coma patients.

Posted in Funny Peculiar | 1 Comment »

One Response

  1. xJane Says:

    OMEGs, these are even more amazing than usual!

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