Real women have razor-sharp teeth and barbed tentacles and oh god who opened a portal to the real women dimension THEY’RE COMING RUN
— missokistic

I am not paying for a full year membership at the Y when I only need the pool long enough to hold one hamster Viking funeral.
— ninjadinosaur1

I love how in Addams Family Values at the beginning they’re like is it a boy? is a girl? and Gomez is just like IT’S AN ADDAMS :D like stop trying to gender my baby, it’s goth that’s all that matters
— vivisextion

[medusa’s husband sighing and pulling a wad of snakes out of the shower drain]
— TheCatWhisprer

You are haunted by the ghosts of Peter Venkman, Ray Stantz, Egon Spengler and Winston Zeddemore, and there absolutely no one you can call
— badedgecases

Ghosts are hard to photograph because, when alive, many didn’t believe in ghosts, and now they’re embarrassed to be ghosts, so they hide.
— thewritertype

Every time I feel unexpected pain, I wonder if my descendants got hit so hard that their ancestors could feel it.
— rShowerThoughts

A man I don’t know tells me to smile. My jaw unhinges and the True Me emerges from my throat. She is smiling, but not like he’d hoped.
— ErinEph

lavabendinggemqueen:
      writing-prompt-s:
      Cthulhu, as an eldritch being, sees humans as humans see insects;
       which is to say, harmless but inexplicably terrifying.
#cthulhu chasing humanity around with a shoe while crying

Maybe she’s born with it. Maybe it’s the result of a freak lab accident that altered her DNA and turned her into a–look, just run already.
— missokistic