The Art of Darkness

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January 31st, 2017 by Cobwebs

You know, sometimes, late at night, in the dark, I ask myself: Am I REALLY that likely to be eaten by a grue?

“Wheeeeee!” – Glenn Danzig, riding an owl around a graveyard

“The princess dies. And then the people trying to save her die. Dragon guarding the castle? Dead”
– Bedtime at George R.R. Martin’s house

If someone dramatically says “don’t ask”, I like to loudly exclaim “phew, you don’t have to tell me twice, I really didn’t care”.

“Fuck it, just add a werewolf” – the 80’s.

When I die, I’d like my remains scattered along the beach.
That said, I do not want to be cremated.

When one door closes, lock it securely, along with all your other doors, before any inspirational quotes get in.

when space aliens arrive and ask us to take them to our leader we should take them to the zoo and show them a flamingo

The saddest movies are the ones where the awesome weird girl turns normal and everyone is bizarrely happy about it.

Back in my day they taught the five R’s: Reading, ‘Riting, ‘Rithmetic, Rhience, and Rocial Rudies. My teacher was a Hanna-Barbera dog.

Posted in Funny Peculiar | 2 Comments »

2 Responses

  1. Mim Says:

    Inspirational quotes must die. (There’s an idea for a videogame in there…)

    And now I want George RR Martin to write a children’s book.

  2. Devries Says:

    “Fuck it, just add a Vampire” – the 60’s; hey it worked for Dark Shadows. Barnabas was not in Season one at all but added later in the series to boost ratings.

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