Seen Online
“You don’t care,” he called into the void.
‘no’ the void replied.
“The universe is not fair, or kind, or just!”
‘no,’ the void said, ‘but’
“What?”
‘you can do what the universe can not, be what it can not, and care’
— MicroSFF
Every plant outside is plotting to turn your body into dirt.
— DothTheDoth
A vampire doesn’t produce a reflection in a mirror and whatever creature I am doesn’t register with sensors on automatic sinks and soap dispensers in public bathrooms.
— FeralCrone
the three stages of a woman’s life:
– the chosen one
– queen whom all bow before
– crime-solving wood witch
— SketchesbyBoze
Ay yo what’s up fam, it’s your boy Fortunato, here with a new uncasking vid. My boy Monty says he’s got a hold of something really special, let’s take a look.
— TheFattig
Say a word with enough feeling, enough times, and it becomes. An entity – demon, god, spirit? – of that name is born.
Fuck haunted us with snarled annoyance, so we shared pictures of cats, puppies, and otters, until finally, Aww woke with a cute little sneeze. That’ll protect us.
— MicroSFF
They did walk into Mordor. I watched that movie and walking is exactly how they arrived in Mordor. They sure as fuck just simply walked into it. I saw.
— edotwoods
Picked up a hitchhiker last night. He said thanks how do you know I’m not a serial killer? I replied the chances of two serial killers being in the same car are astronomical
— gonzotrucker
gonna make a game called Murder Simulator but it’s just an RTS where you control a bunch of crows and have them steal french fries and stuff
— RainBlackKat
I look up at the night sky.
“That’s a pretty universe, God. You are wearing it well.”
“Thanks,” I hear in a faint whisper, “it has pockets.”
— MicroSFF
Posted in Funny Peculiar | 3 Comments »
June 22nd, 2018 at 1:49 pm
I hear Montrasour throws great wine parties in his cellar. I am trying to get invited to one
June 22nd, 2018 at 1:50 pm
I really like the void one
July 31st, 2018 at 6:57 pm
That is a godsdamned lie. If god was a woman, everything would have pockets. If god was a man, he wouldn’t bother to so declare about this universe.