The Insidious Bogleech recently asked why so much science fiction treats humans as the boring, weak, dumb ones.

I want to see a sci fi universe where we’re actually considered one of the more hideous and terrifying species.

How do we know our saliva and skin oils wouldn’t be ultra-corrosive to most other sapient races? What if we actually have the strongest vocal chords and can paralyze or kill the inhabitants of other worlds just by screaming at them? What if most sentient life in the universe turns out to be vegetable-like and lives in fear of us rare “animal” races who can move so quickly and chew shit up with our teeth?

Like that old story “they’re made of meat,” only we’re scarier.

Tom Scott took that idea and ran with it, producing this educational safety video for alien interstellar travelers:

(via Neatorama)

Every so often, amongst the one-off projects I do for my own amusement, I actually bestir myself to put together more elaborate pieces and sell ’em. I’ve got just such a thing up on eBay right now, a nice fresh Vampire Hunting Kit with all the trimmings.

If you buy it, mention this blog in your buyer comments and I’ll send ya something special.

Fatally Yours Gourmet Chocolates – Gorgeous box of chocolates in spooky shapes. Vegan-friendly.

Diesel Tactics – Steampunk-themed online strategy game.

Bedtime Story – Dad makes an excellent point.

10 Tragedies Caught on Film – Vintage footage of events like the Hindenberg disaster.

Gone Home – Computer game with an unusual “exploration and revelation” premise.

Murderpedia – Online encyclopedia of murderers.

Colossal Whale – I quite like this artwork, and imagine there isn’t a pair of dry britches anywhere on those ships.

Lorem Gibson – Lorem Ipsum generator which uses text based on the works of William Gibson. “pistol rebar sunglasses industrial grade beef noodles lights rain decay”

Murder Ballads – Interesting article, along with many examples, of songs about murder (many commemorating real crimes).

Dia de los Muertos Cakes – Roundup of gorgeous themed cakes.

I’ve been fascinated by Hands of Glory ever since I first read about them in The House with a Clock in its Walls, and when Dave Lowe posted a prop he’d made, that was the motivation to try my hand (har!) at something similar.

A Hand of Glory is the mummified (sometimes pickled) hand of a hanged criminal; it’s often specified as being the left (“sinister”) hand, or if he were hanged for murder, the hand that “did the deed.” It’s topped with a candle made from his fat mixed with virgin beeswax; in some traditions his hair is used as a wick. It is variously described as making its holder invisible, rendering anyone who sees it motionless, or causing the residents of a house to remain asleep as long as it’s present inside; sometimes it’s also credited with the power to unlock doors. Such a device would, obviously, be of great use to burglars or others who wish to remain undetected.

I wanted to make my hand a little less cartoony-looking than Lowe’s version, but I quite liked his notion of crudely lashing the forearm to a candlestick; it looks just like the sort of jury-rigging born of convenience.

I used the same pantyhose-and-glue method as for my mummified fairy, and I’m quite pleased with the result. If you’d like to try it yourself, I’ve posted a full tutorial here.

As terrifying as being attacked by a mugger would be, it’s not often that you get an excuse to try to blind someone
— bridger_w

Next time your kid won’t eat carrots, scream: “Snowmen had to DIE for this meal!”
— AaronFullerton

“It’s A Wonderful Life” would be WAY darker if when George sees life without him, there’s 30 kids alive in town who had died mysteriously.
— rolldiggity

3-year-old: Let’s play zombies
Me: OK
3: You’re the dad zombie, I’m the mom zombie & this is the baby
She tricked me into playing house
— XplodingUnicorn

Heads will roll. Torsos will kind of roll. Limbs will roll a short distance. Jawbones just kind of hit the ground & flip once.
— NightValeRadio

The worst thing about losing your glasses is having to drive to work with your head out of the window, beeping like a bat.
— ChribHibble

The worst thing about the 1978 Lord of the Rings cartoon is how they plan to destroy the ring by melting it in fondue.
— KenJennings

My daughter’s fortune cookie was empty and now we’re all sitting around waiting for her to die.
— scottsimpson

For me, “You can’t please everyone” isn’t a lament or an excuse. It’s a mission statement.
— kierongillen

‘Better than Laurie Strode’ probably isn’t the best way to market my skills as a babysitter.
— gordonshumway

The Willard Asylum for the Insane in New York was built in 1869 and closed in 1995 (to reopen as a drug rehabilitation facility). At its peak it housed 4000 patients, and more than half of the 50,000 people who called it their home died there: Although attempts were made to integrate later patients back into society, in its early days “people didn’t leave unless it was in a box.”

Asylum inmates were allowed to bring one case of possessions with them, and between 1910 and 1960 many of these suitcases were stored upon their deaths. When the facility was closed, the New York State Museum was given the opportunity to remove some historic items and one of the workers found the cases. After a small selection was displayed at the museum, photographer Jon Krispin launched a successful Kickstarter campaign to document the suitcases and their contents. The results are fascinating and heartbreaking.

Earlier today I uploaded Agnes J’s case to the willardsuitcases.com site….She is important for many reasons, not the least of which is that her satchel contained a wealth of correspondence that revealed so much about her life. Hers was the first case that I shot with so much personal information.

There is a line in the letter below that explains so much about her being sent to Willard.

“But don’t come back to the Y.W. and threaten to kill that girl again–that’s what put you where you are now.” Chilling and so sad.

You can see the photos at Krispin’s blog and at the Willard Asylum Suitcases site. It’s a unique glimpse into the lives of these people, and the things they found important enough to bring with them on their (often one-way) trip to the asylum.

This BBC clip is wonderful.

This concludes the latest Link-Dump Extravaganza. We’ll return to regular posting (and once-a-week dumps) on Monday.

The First Animated Gifs – A small collection of animated images created from vintage phenakistoscopes. They are mostly creepy as hell.

SOVRIN – Etsy store with lots of witchy clothing.

Lord of the Rings Cupcakes – These designs by Wir Machen Cupcakes are just adorable.

Magician Baby Announcement – This multi-stage photo is a brilliant idea.

30 Deserted Places That Truly Look Beautiful – Roundup of lovely photos.

Lux Aeterna – Lovely orchestral leitmotif from the movie Requiem for a Dream.

Love is More Than Words – Morticia and Wednesday depicted as Madonna and Child. The painting is by Isabel Samaras, whose site is NSFW.

Cleaver Ring – The blood is optional, but is a nice touch.

Medusa Door Knocker – This oughta startle visitors.

Kisses of Death – Creepy little sculptures of chocolate kisses with a skull center.

Bonus Links

The 10 Most Dangerous Places in New York City – An amusing roundup.

The Laundry – RPG based on Charles Stross’ “Laundry Files” series.

Vanity Project – Gorgeous vintage-inspired clothing by Limb.

Disney Villain Sugar Skulls – Printed set of Disney-themed calaveras. I like the apples in the Wicked Queen’s eyes.

Spotted Centipede – Whimsical little felted centipede.

Victorian Ghost Photography – Charmingly old-fashioned “trick photography.”

Gammaraybots – Etsy shop offering unique mini sculptures, including some great goth-friendly cake toppers.

Top 10 Stupidest/Weirdest Jack the Ripper Theories – An amusing roundup.

Shrunken Head Lollipops – Brilliant tutorial for converting skull-shaped suckers into shrunken heads.

Hamlet Absinthe – Absinthe in a skull-shaped bottle; tres gothe. Also available in several other colors, which I find vaguely off-putting. (The black is sort of neat, but the blue is…odd.)

The Most Horrifying Parasites – You weren’t planning on eating again any time soon, were you?

Neil Gaiman on Libraries – Lovely essay on the importance of libraries.

A Spider Did Not Bite You – Buzz Hoot Roar explains, with the help of adorable little cartoon spiders, why a brown recluse is probably not responsible for your “bite.” (Speaking of brown recluses, I always thought this was funny.)

Fake Bugs – “Phony bugs are our business.”

Beaded Death’s Head Hawkmoth – This gorgeous beaded brooch has already sold, but something similar would look stunning embroidered on a blouse.

Bonus Links

Silly Scary Songs – A collection of vintage spooky songs, such as Spike Jones’ rendition of (Ghost) Riders in the Sky. (Hat tip to pdq)

Scary Hairy Bat – Cute craft project. No instructions, but looks reasonably DIY-able.

Alice in Wonderland Doorknob – I had no idea the cartoon talking doorknob was so popular, but there are loads of people who make and sell these (some are functional, others are just for display).

Gentler Horror Films – A silly Twitter list.

Haunted Mansion Wedding Cake – This is utterly gorgeous. I love all of the little details.

Tentacle Cookie Jar – This looks reasonably do-able and the results are really striking. (Hat tip to Sisifo)

Crafty Tattoos – Pinterest board of craft-themed tattoos.

Kitchen Canister Makeover – This is a neat tutorial for sprucing up thrift-store canisters. They got a more recent makeover here.

Spoopy Games – Roundup of casual-play games with horror themes.

Lord of the Rings Knitting Patterns – A whole series of lovely designs themed around characters and places from the series.

Witch Hat Arbor – Awesome, possibly replicable by mere mortals (albeit with a lot of work) landscaping detail.

Muffin – Skeletal rocking horse created as the mount for a spooky china doll. A full-sized one would be amazing in a gothy playroom.

Harry Potter Stilettos – Great-looking “Hogwarts House” designs.

Steampunk Shoot – Gallery of photos from a steampunk wedding. Some great inspiration.

Skeletal Wine Glass – (The photo is the best I could find.) From what I can gather, this was a concept design and didn’t see production. Pity.

Bonus Links

Sassy Feet – Site devoted to upcycling shoes (and handbags). Some great ideas. (Hat tip to xJane)

When You Die – This cartoon amused me.

Halloween Lips – Great makeup idea. Check out the rest of the artist’s gallery as well.

Jack Skellington Light – Super-easy mod to a dollar store push-light.

Anatomical Maquettes of Fanciful Creatures – Just in case you wondered what Ganesha would look like with his skin off.