The Art of Darkness

Seen Online

May 17th, 2011 by Cobwebs

At 11:59 PM Cinderella should’ve said to the Prince, “I bet you a million bucks I can turn that carriage into a pumpkin.”

“HERE COMES THE TICKLE MONSTER!” the villagers cried, fleeing from the beast. But he wouldn’t stop, he would never stop.

Of course this Indian Burial Ground is haunted, it was built on an INDIAN BURIAL GROUND

The more inappropriate a time to make a joke, the funnier that joke will be.

Unfortunately at no point during my workday does anyone ever have cause to shout my name and then toss me a sword.

Goths love cats because they are elegant, independent, aloof, sleep a lot and throw up on things, just like Goths.
Stuff Goths Like

Whenever I hear a lady in the next stall trying to unwrap a tampon as quietly as possible I want to yell HEY IS THAT CANDY CAN I HAVE SOME

I think it’s safe to assume that we all kind of know what Judas Iscariot would have done for a Klondike Bar.

If the hospital let me cut my son’s umbilical cord, you’d think this stupid funeral home would let me embalm my dad.

Attention sad young and not-so-young men being preyed upon by unscrupulous marketers: if Prince William is balding THERE IS NO CURE.

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